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The Main Event Vol. 163 - Fathers Day

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  • The Main Event Vol. 163 - Fathers Day

    (Writers Note: This column was originally intended for Fathers Day)

    "A full English Breakfast, that's what we would normally do for my father on the day that all father's are celebrated. But not this year. Not last year, either, and most likely next year he'll be missing out too. I guess that's the sacrifice my dad is constantly preaching about. But I'm not happy about this. Not one bit. I didn't ask for my dad not to be here on the day when all of my friends are celebrating with their dads. Then again, my dad's not like other dads. No, he's a professional wrestler and sometimes the only way I can spend time with him is by sitting as close to the television as possible, whenever he's on the screen."

    That could very well be an honest perspective of a professional wrestler's child. More often than not their parents are on the road and I don't think many people really appreciate what having an absent father - albeit due to work - can have on a child. We all need our parents growing up so imagine you only get to see a parent a couple times a week with their only presence being onscreen more often than not. How disconnected would you feel from somebody who's supposed to be an important part of your life? It can be tragic long term as it affects some kids more than others.

    Every child that has an absent father, regardless of reason, feels that longing of a love they're missing out on. That jealousy of bearing witness to other kids having what they do not. It's arguable that having a father who is a part of your life but chooses a job that keeps him away from you is more traumatizing than having a completely absent father. For some kids, there could be a resentment that grows after that could negatively affect their relationship.

    All kids think differently and if they can't logically reason why their father chooses to be away from them, they could even end up lashing out on society, especially considering their fathers won't be there for them to lash out on. I, myself, lost my father when I was ten. So from personal experience I know full well the consequences of what that parental gap can bring. I can assure you, it's not joy. Which is why it's of the utmost importance for a father to be involved in his child's life, especially when he's willing and able.

    "A full English Breakfast, that's what I would normally get on Fathers Day. But not this year. No, this year I'm working a PPV and what with them being on Sunday's, there's no chance for me to be involved this year. Then again, it feels like I'm always working and never involved. Always on the road. It's ironic. I'm always on the road to provide for my kid so I'm doing this for him but yet it feels so hollow.

    What kind of father am I? I wonder... What does he think when he sees me more on the television screen than he does in real life? Does he even care? Has he buried his love and longing for me because he knows that although I provide stability, there's not enough time spent to enjoy it together. My mother taught me that spending time means more than spending money, and I think she may be on to something. Is the money and the fame really worth it?"

    I bet that's a question many a wrestling father have asked themselves over the years. With me, growing up without a father caused many a psychological issue, especially considering the manner in which he died. My mother, only about 34 at the time, was lost and had a huge job on her hands. Unfortunately, she couldn't cut it to both provide financial and emotional stability. She was good with the former as I never went without, despite a period where she was suffering financially. But what she was incapable of showing was the emotion you get from a mother and the time that needs to be spent.

    And that's what it all boils down to: time. They say it's of the essence and from experience that is one hundred percent accurate. That's what's lacking in the lives of kids of professional wrestlers. Missing out on Fathers Day and the lack of time spent with your family on a day that celebrates you makes you question yourself. It makes you question your priorities and what's really important in this world. The answer to that should be family, but life always ends up adding nuances to the question.

    Questions like "What else could I do besides being a professional wrestler?". At the end of the day, though, food needs to be put on the table. And if you've known nothing besides wrestling your entire life it can make it difficult to choose another career path. Therefore I can only imagine the duality that wrestlers may feel. On the one hand they want to spend more time with their families but on the other they need to put food on the table. It's quite the catch 22. There just doesn't seem to be a viable solution, unless you're a top dog in the company and only work certain dates and get privileges that allow you more time with the family.

    It's definitely tough to be a wrestler. You miss out on all the big days. Not only Fathers Day but Christmas, birthdays and the like. And perhaps even when you do get to spend time with your kids you're too banged up to play catch. That's the life of those entertaining us on a weekly basis. Therefore we should show our appreciation by sparing a thought for professional wrestlers on special days. Days where we're in a room filled with life and our loved ones, while they're in a room filled with strangers.

  • #2
    It's clear you dug deep for this one emotionally, and that always means a lot to a column. So sorry to hear about your dad and the hard times that came after, my friend.

    Reading this reminds me why I am so glad that house shows are now almost a thing of the past, in fact I think only WWE still runs them so anyone who works elsewhere has the freedom to only work a few days a week and spend more time with the family. Much healthier too, I'm sure. I have no doubt many wrestling fathers have struggled with this over the years, though I also wonder if becoming a wrestler requires a somewhat selfish mindset which might keep such thoughts away. Who knows for sure? I'm lucky to have my dad still around and we talk often, and I'm always thinking about the time I can spend with my kid.

    Good stuff Don, nice to see a column still come through here now and again.

    The '92 Rumble! The Brain's Finest Hour!


    • #3
      I certainly dug deep for this one to give it that extra emotional tick.

      Yes, it does appear that these days schedules have been reduced. That's a good thing for the wrestlers as well as their families. Perhaps it's getting closer and closer to a day job.

      Thanks for stopping by!