Body Count Backstage Brawls - DOGMA EXPLODES!

Krimson Mask · #1 04-08-2009, 10:12 PM

Backstage Brawls LIVE from Sydney, Australia

Coming LIVE from ANZ Stadium

Backstage Brawl for +1 Body Count
Big B. Brown vs. Pope Fred

PROMO ONLY until Saturday, April 11.
VOTING ONLY until Monday, April 13.
Each promo can contain no more than 1000 words or you will risk being disqualified.
Must name five restaurants in the promo.
Good luck gentlemen.

PopeFred · #2 04-09-2009, 01:14 AM

(Pope Fred and Roseanne are walking the streets of New York City, the video is dated to December 1st, 2008. Stock brokers are running the street and people are in chaos. Newspapers of the coming economic doom are plastered across the newsstands as they walk by.)

Roseanne: This economy is hurting everyone. I hear that last year when IHOP bought out Applebee’s everyone thought it was genius, but now all the money they borrowed is killing them. They say the company is on a tough path ahead of them. Those are two of your favorite restaurants aren’t they?

Pope Fred: Yeah, Give me a Corned Beef Hash and Cheese Omelet and Three Pancakes Please! Remember when I was wrestling - all that Burger King junk food Big B. would bring around?

Roseanne: I haven’t been able to look at a Sourdough Bacon Cheese Burger the same way since. That was a very difficult period in your life wasn’t it?

Pope Fred: After I lost those two matches to Bloodrose and Son of Repoman it became more and more difficult to keep Dogma together. I had gone from a 4-1 wonder to nearly .500 since the day I met those three. That lost to Showstoppa at Endgame was the tipping point. I was unraveling. Dogma wasn’t working… I wasn’t funny anymore… My joke was over, and all I had left was a fat guy and vegetable.

Roseanne: I knew this part… but what really happened?

Pope Fred: Well…I was so depressed after losing to Blackwell in Long Island I walked out back of the arena to calm my pain and all that came out was a song…

(Flashback to the filthy back alley in Long Island behind the arena, Pope Fred is standing in the rain with his frilly Dogma Robe tossed slightly off his shoulders. His head is tilted back and the most beautiful tone and quality of voice begins to come from his mouth. So beautiful it cleared the rain and the sound stimulated sight and sensation. As the Pope sang a man in a white suit walks in and quietly listens from the corner barely sheltered from the rain.)

I am not the man I pledged to be
Dogma has ridden me down
When the moment broke the day
Alone in a Wedding Gown

Dogma was to be a Tree
Its roots laid at Endgame
Now I feel the urge to flee
For fear of being lame

Broken by the community I see
Always a man of faith rises
I mean really – Golly Gee
Out of reach are the Prizes

Let the Vegetable run free
Brown, Broccoli, and Blackwell
I broke the their faith in three
I’m the Pope ridden to Hell

(With that, the man that had been listening aside put his arm around the Pope and they slowly begin to talk, casually at first and then… Well let’s just say – I could describe gay flirting but let’s not and just say – It was a pretty good example of suckface-sloppypants.)

Pope Fred: …and that’s when I knew that I needed to follow my voice and become a Broadway Star.

Roseanne: So that’s how you met Zest, you’re Croatian Boyfriend.

Pope Fred: Exactly – we left there and I hired him as my agent. He had some great connections on Broadway and my voice is so beautiful it was not hard to sell me as the next big Broadway sensation. Now, I shower with Zest every morning.

Roseanne: I still think that’s creepy… o.k. that’s enough of this – I’m getting hungry. Let’s go to Tao for lunch.

Pope Fred: Tao? You really think I can just walk in there any time and get reservations? Are you kidding me? I’m good but I’m no Dennis Rodman. Let’s go to the Tavern on the Green over in Central Park and 67th. I’ve always loved the food there. I’ll call Zest, he can meet us there.

(The siblings are seen crossing the urban jungle of Manhattan on their way to the Tavern on the Green. All the famous landmarks are shown – Times Square, the United Nation, China Town… needless to say no one would walk to the Tavern on the Green this way but LPW received a sizeable payment from the NYC tourism bureau prior to the filming of this promo. The scene ends with the siblings opening the door and being excitedly greeted by a staff ready to treat the Broadway star with the service he deserved.)

Pope Fred: Excuse me, but has my friend Zest arrived…

Maitre'De: I’m sorry but he left with a very large black man about 2 minutes before you arrived. They left you this note…

Visagra · #3 04-11-2009, 09:54 PM

(We see a dark room with a man sitting in a chair. You can’t see who it is.)

Dogma.

A stable that was going to revolutionize Lords of Pain Wrestling. A stable that would be bigger than any stable LPW had seen before. A stable consisting of Pope Fred, Big B. Brown, Joe Broccoli, and Roseanne. The critics doubted them. Other wrestlers said it wouldn’t last long. They said Dogma was dog shit. So were these critics correct? Damn right they were. Within no time, the losses started to pile up for Dogma. Pope Fred and Roseanne disappeared leaving Big B. Brown and Joe Broccoli as a tag team. It started out well for Big B. and Joe. They won their first tag match without the Pope but that would be the only match they would win as a team. Joe Broccoli soon disappeared after that leaving Big B. Brown on his own.

Big B. Brown would flounder around for awhile wondering where he career was headed. Finally, one day something came along for the big man. Cash Flo offered to pay him money to be his tag team partner. Big B. Brown was skeptical of this at first but he couldn’t turn down the money. Together these two known as The Franchise Players have become a force to be reckoned with in the tag team division. All was going well for Big B. Brown until he saw that Pope Fred had returned.

Big B knew it wouldn’t be long until he had to encounter Pope Fred. Big B wants the Pope to pay for all the pain and struggle his career went through as a member of Dogma. Big B wants to make the Pope suffer for his sins. Big B wants to see the Pope destroyed at his own hands. The Pope will then have to plead for forgiveness but Big B won’t allow it. Big B will just spit in the Pope’s face and kick his face onto the ground.

(The light in the room comes on and the camera pans over to Big B. Brown sitting in another chair.)

Big B: I really wish you would say Pope Fred every time instead of just The Pope. It sounds like I’m about to beat down the real Pope. That doesn’t exactly make me sound like a good person.

(The camera pans over to the man who was talking. It turns out that man was Willem Dafoe.)

Willem Dafoe: You shouldn’t be a good person. You’re becoming too soft. You should be a monster. A cold, uncaring monster that wouldn’t hesitate to beat down the real Pope. Instead you are too busy playing the funny fat man. You need to let your anger get the best of you. Let the anger take over as you beat Pope Fred to an inch of his life leaving him a bloody mess.

Big B: Don’t you think that is a little extreme. I know he didn’t help me career and all but to beat him that badly.

Willem Dafoe: It needs to be done if you want to be a big star in LPW. You need to finally conquer your past so you can look into the future. The future is bright for a man like you. You just have to let the power inside you go.

Big B: Power inside me? You do know that I’m the 496 Pound Wrecking Machine? I plow through my opponents like nothing. I’m the unstoppable force and the immovable object. I’m a beast.

Willem Dafoe: No, you aren’t. You are just a fat man trying to lose weight. You have no killer instinct. You are no beast until you can show that you can destroy Pope Fred and put an end to Dogma for good.

Big B: There’s nothing wrong with me trying to lose weight. I gave up on all those fattening restaurants like McDonalds, Kentucky Fried Chicken, Taco Bell, Arby’s and even Hardees. I’m using this weight loss to become a brand new type of monster. One that will be more mobile and even stronger. This will lead me to success. I promise you.

Willem Dafoe: I think you will just become even more weak than you already are. Your career in LPW probably won’t change at all. You will be a failure forever unless you listen to my advice. You must beat down Pope Fred until he is in a hospital. I want to see him paralyzed from the neck down. Do I make myself clear?

Big B: Why did you ask me to do this? All you have done is criticize me. I wouldn’t have let you have this job if I knew you would do that. You just seem to be acting a little crazy. It also seems like you really hate Pope Fred. I know Pope Fred didn’t help out my career much but what did he ever do to you?

Willem Dafoe: So you figured out my true scheme. I have my reasons for you to severely hurt Pope Fred. I went to a Broadway show where he was performing and I didn’t really like it that much. I didn’t find him too good at what he was doing.

Big B: So what do you want me to do about that?

Willem Dafoe: AVENGE ME!!!!

(End Promo)