The Jack of All Trades (2-1-10)

[Jack Tripper]

"Never mind who you thought I was. I'm Rick James, Bitch!!!


As we celebrate Rick James and Big Boi's birthday, I have decided to kick off this February a new blog :




Welcome to The Jack of All Trades. Back for a new edition, I decided to run with the last blog. I read the comments from the first blog and I wanted to dedicate part of this blog to one specific comment. And here it is.


Friends Don’t Let Friends Sleep Alone

I know this is a song by Joe, from his latest album “Signature”. The title tells its own tale. Have you ever been told that you were like a sibling to someone you like? How about best friend? If so, how did you feel? Disgusted? Shamed? Fooled? Don’t worry, you’re not alone. The person who says these things doesn’t really think much of themselves. In reality, they are jacked up beyond repair. Some of these people are stuck on themselves, simply because they are choosey beggars. I’ll provide you with an example or two.

Some years ago, I met this girl my mom worked with. She was real cute. Had glasses and everything was all to the good. I’d give a full description, but there should be no reason your keyboard and monitor should be sticky. Anyway, they picked me up so I could get my haircut. At this time, I wasn’t fully about macking at the time and more on hiatus than anything. When they came, I sat in the backseat and had to deal with girl talk. I throw on my mp3 player and let it fly. Something told me to listen to some of their banter. As I was listening to them, I noticed something: The female was NOT at all what I wanted. Her mouth proved to be her downfall, as every word was Motherfucker this, Motherfucker that. Listen, the chick looked good, but her vocabulary was garbage. As time passed, I found out that my mom and her friends were campaigning hard for me to be with this girl. The girl pretty much wasn’t budging. She pulled the whole “He’s like a brother to me” and told my mother that “You’re like my mother”. My mom basically called her on her bullshit and told the girl that she couldn’t handle a man and that she should stick with the thugs and nobodies she is used to. Its funny that she said I was like a brother to her. I only met the chick twice and never again. And she’s currently in a relationship with an ex-best friend of mine.




I have to be real honest with you. Women don't have male friends unless the guy is taken or the guy is gay. If you are neither, you are just an associate. YES. Like Too $hort said: "You're just a rest haven for hoes". Sorry to say that, but to a degree, its true. As men, its in our nature to have as many women as we can get. Some of us think that if we get on the girls good side by being friends, we can get them to like and want us. Not true. You're considered a safe bet. Which means that you are not an option or desire to that woman. You are a shoulder to cry on and a mat for them to walk on. I'm not saying you can't or shouldn't be friends with women, but know when you are being BS'd. If you feel more than friendship and she doesn't, its not going to work because you're forcing it. Women can sense if you want to hit it. You have to know if the girl can keep it 100% or she's being a complete bitch. In short; Don't settle on being friends. You'll lose. Now you can go with it, but let her know that you have options.

Never let the "friendship" have limits. Always know that there are loopholes in male/female friendships. Just because you're friends, It doesn't mean you should or have to sleep alone.



My point about friends and relative referencing shows that if they call it, you should act on it. I mean, if the female uses the sibling line, you treat their ass like you would your own brother or sister. I do the play fighting and cracking harsh jokes.





Real quick, 5 ways to NOT get put in the friend zone:

1. Don’t be a kiss ass. Its cool to compliment a woman, but keep it to a minimum.

2. Show strength. I don’t mean pick her up and give her an F-5. Make the woman feel secure and comfortable around you. This also means that you have to feel secure and confident in yourself.

3. Don’t always say yes. If you say yes to everything, like helping her move or getting her something to eat late at night and you haven’t even gotten any play. Saying yes all the time gets you locked in the friend zone.

4. Make time for other women. This one is somewhat effective. All you have to do is increase your female clientele and keep busy, you’ll never have to worry about being stuck in quicksand. Don’t invest all time and energy into one woman, unless she’s giving all of herself and a hell of a lot more.

5. Walk away. Like I said in my first blog, If she puts friendship in the way, she’s probably got some guys on the side or she’s taken. Friend Zones are like the Bermuda triangle: Once you go in, your ass is gone. You need to make your situation more like the Triangle Offense.







In short, I’m just blogging. I’ll get the hang of it soon. I’ll have a new blog up and running real soon. So, ask your questions and write your comments.

[Uncle Joe]

Son, me and you need to get together and do a podcast man.

[DA I VAN]

Thanks for writing this 2 months too late.

[Hustle]

I'm happy that you decided to follow through and actually start doing these blogs. When you first told me you were thinking about dropping knowledge, I knew you'd be successful at it, and I was right.

I really dig the "Friend Zone Avoidance" tips. Kinda reminds me of my "Swagger" column back in the day. lol. The one about strength is especially true, in my opinion. Women can easily see the strength that we, as men, exude, and they flock to that.

Please make these a regular deal, bro. I appreciate the direction and the insight you're taking your blog in. It's different, and that's what this place needs.

[T.O.]

I nominate this blog for the front page upon launch.

Jack Tripper
Uncle Joe

Shit, I don't know who else. Those two are head and shoulders above the rest.

[Jack Tripper]

Originally Posted by Uncle Joe

Son, me and you need to get together and do a podcast man.

I'm down. I was actually thinking about creating a podcast and putting it on youtube or something. I read the one about cockblocking. After reading that one, Why not do a podcast? We can hook one up.

Originally Posted by DA I VAN

Thanks for writing this 2 months too late.

If there was a Blog Cabin then, I would've. I'll be posting again.

Originally Posted by Hustle

I'm happy that you decided to follow through and actually start doing these blogs. When you first told me you were thinking about dropping knowledge, I knew you'd be successful at it, and I was right.

I really dig the "Friend Zone Avoidance" tips. Kinda reminds me of my "Swagger" column back in the day. lol. The one about strength is especially true, in my opinion. Women can easily see the strength that we, as men, exude, and they flock to that.

Please make these a regular deal, bro. I appreciate the direction and the insight you're taking your blog in. It's different, and that's what this place needs.

Thanks. I was going to blog a while ago, but wasn't sure what to blog about. I used to write all the time, but then I suffered from writer's block. Believe me, it has been hard to shake for a long time. This is a good way to shake the rust off as well. I'll be posting real soon.

[MissouriDragon]

What was it Chris Rock said about being a dick in a glass case?

Good shit, but you forgot one thing:

You're going to have to be an asshole sometimes. Don't keep getting pushed around by your 'friend', or by an ex-girlfriend because you're too nice to just be a self-centered, self-serving asshole about things. It saves everybody a lot of trouble in the end if you just do it once, change the relationship irrevocably and walk off into the sunset.

[Jack Tripper]

Originally Posted by MissouriDragon

What was it Chris Rock said about being a dick in a glass case?

Good shit, but you forgot one thing:

You're going to have to be an asshole sometimes. Don't keep getting pushed around by your 'friend', or by an ex-girlfriend because you're too nice to just be a self-centered, self-serving asshole about things. It saves everybody a lot of trouble in the end if you just do it once, change the relationship irrevocably and walk off into the sunset.

I put the don't always say yes tip on here instead of being an asshole. Any guy can be an asshole, but keeping it 100% is better. No matter what happens, you're still going to be an asshole. When done properly, one of three things will happen:

1. She'll "quit you"
2. She'll sweat you
3. She'll comply.


You are right about it saving you and everyone else involved the trouble. But if it that's the case, then why even try in the first place. Being an asshole usually don't work unless you've always been one. Believe me, I used to try and realized that it wasn't in my character.

[MissouriDragon]

I know a lot of cats who are just flat-out too damn nice to these chicks. That simply doesn't work. No girl wants a milksop but that's exactly what these fools are giving her.

I have no problem being an asshole, not a 'make somebody hate you forever' asshole, but just enough to let people know I'm no pushover.

[Uncle Joe]

Most bitches like it when they feel you're a threat to their lives, or at least well being. Most of my female associates (thank you Jack) always leave or cheat on their good natured boyfriends for "thugs" and drug dealers and just overall scumbags, dropouts and the general shit stains of the earth.

[T.O.]

Originally Posted by MissouriDragon

I have no problem being an asshole, not a 'make somebody hate you forever' asshole, but just enough to let people know I'm no pushover.

My fatal flaw.

[MissouriDragon]

I can't remember who said it, may have been in a Bret Easton Ellis book, but the paraphrased quote is

"What do you mean I'm only looking out for myself? If MissouriDragon doesn't look out for MissouriDragon, who will, Batman?"

What I mean by that is you need to be a selfish asshole ("What are you going to do for me if I help you move that couch?") as opposed to someone who really lays into somebody on a personal level. Nice guys give a chick a ride to their boyfriend's place. Selfish assholes get road head on the way and stop the car if they stop sucking, or they don't take 'em.

[Jack Tripper]

Originally Posted by MissouriDragon

I can't remember who said it, may have been in a Bret Easton Ellis book, but the paraphrased quote is

"What do you mean I'm only looking out for myself? If MissouriDragon doesn't look out for MissouriDragon, who will, Batman?"

What I mean by that is you need to be a selfish asshole ("What are you going to do for me if I help you move that couch?") as opposed to someone who really lays into somebody on a personal level. Nice guys give a chick a ride to their boyfriend's place. Selfish assholes get road head on the way and stop the car if they stop sucking, or they don't take 'em.

I agree 100%. I didn't want to put that on here just yet. Some people get the two confused. So I decided to put the lighter version up.

[MissouriDragon]

Sorry man, didn't mean to step on your material. Keep it up though, doin' the Lord's work here. Some dudes need this kind of help. I've got a request I think you could use too.

[Jack Tripper]

Originally Posted by MissouriDragon

Sorry man, didn't mean to step on your material. Keep it up though, doin' the Lord's work here. Some dudes need this kind of help. I've got a request I think you could use too.

No problem. Thanks for your input. You obviously know where this is coming from. Whats your request? you could pm it.