Boys From Aus 1: Down Under Thunder

[Vikodin]

Boys From Aus I:Down Under Thunder

Ladies and Gentlemen, grab your shrimp and fire up the barbie it's the Boys from Aus and I am the Gold Standard, Vitamin K. The next Aussie to be a part of this spectacular column is pretty well known around here and he needs no introduction but that won't stop him anyway.

As always I am the man from the land down under, Kano! Vitamin K is on cloud nine right now seeing as Collingwood just defeated Essendon but it was a simple fluke, if Mazza didn't jinx Essendon they would have easily defeated those jobbers known as Collingwood.

That's exactly right Kano, damn foreigners have no idea when it comes to Australian Rules Football. In case you are wondering I am the third down under wonder, Box Car Rocco coming to you live from the Sydney Opera House. Finals is time in the AFL is coming soon, are you looking forward to seeing Collingwood choke Kano?

Heck yes I am BCR, nothing else will make me more happier then to see Collingwood go down harder then Pat Patterson on any given male...actually no Essendon winning will make me even happier.

You two are obviously clearly more delusional than TNA fans, at the moment on the ladder Collingwood is 4th out of 16 teams while Essendon are only just in the top 8.

Settle down guys, this is a wrestling column after all. The WWE are currently on their yearly tour of Australia and as always, we get shit on seeing as Raw is the brand touring. However, that hasn't stopped the fans from having a good time even though The Miz has been insulting our women. Vitamin K, even though you aren't going to a show, what are your thoughts on the WWE's current tour of Australia.

I think it's great that the good people of Australia get the chance to see the WWE live and in person. Now I don't know who is touring but really, I don't think there is a stronger wrestling roster in the world than WWE. Kano, aren't you going to one of the shows?

Now, I don't care about strong rosters or weak rosters, I am going to the Perth show and to make things even better, I might be sitting front row and working for the WWE the day before. Add in some free merchandise and a meet and greet later, I am certain that Tuesday 7th and Wednesday 8th are going to be 2 kick arse days. Seeing future Hall Of Famers such as Randy Orton will be an amazing experience.

I wouldn't say Orton is a future hall of famer, in a couple of years he may have earned that tag.

Five time WWE World Champion says otherwise.

Doesn't mean he's going to be a Hall Of Famer. Is Randy Savage in the HOF yet? No and he was twice the wrestler that Randy Orton is.

Enough guys, remember when WCW taped a few Thunder's down here way back then? Probably not, but I did see some footage of Scott "pogo stick" Steiner beating up an Aussie fan, how awesome is Steiner. Enough of Aussies getting beaten as it doesn't happen often. I know that we are all big fans of John Morrison, what are your thoughts on him getting a title shot on Summerslam?

Well, if you remember back to the series of ECW title matches he had on ECW against Punk way back when, they were all of a very good quality. Morrison is probably the person who is going to be advantaged most by Edge's injury and with Jeff Hardy looking less and less likely to resign with the WWE, there is going to be some big shoes to fill at the top of the Smackdown main event scene.

Hardy not re-signing pisses me the heck off. The WWE has given Jeff chance after chance after chance and this is how he re-pays them.

I don't believe that Jeff is burnt out and him saying that is just an excuse. When Jeff was in ROH and TNA he was unmotivated, no-showed and just plain sucky. He has only truly been motivated when working for the WWE so why would it change all of a sudden? I think there's a different reason as to why he isn't resigning.

Look the thing is that the WWE workload is a very very heavy workload where they do a lot of touring and for some people they get burnt out quicker than others. I would totally understand if Cena took time off because he was burnt out or Hunter and I can see how someone like Jeff could get burnt out.

Ok, there I will agree, Hardys' style does make him burn out quicker but he's going on his website and counting down how long until he goes, until he's done. It's like spitting in the face of the very people who gave you chance, after chance, after chance.

Ok, guys, it seems that both Orton and Hardy have gotten you do a bit animated. Let's move onto something that invokes a bit less anger, oh who am I kidding. Kano, you have said that you are willing to give TNA a try next week and Kafu has previously written about TNA previously. What are both your current thoughts on what you know about TNA?

TNA are finally starting to improve I think... Samoa Joe turning heel is a great move by TNA, sure the storyline doesn't really make sense but the opportunities Samoa Joe as a heel gives are worth it. Samoa Joe vs AJ Styles, Samoa Joe vs Christopher Daniels, Samoa Joe and Kurt Angle vs AJ Styles and Christopher Daniels? Yes please. Samoa Joe/Styles/Daniels/Angle in a four way? Yes please. Looking beyond the main event, the tag team scene is looking good as well. The new British Invasion stable in the tag team scene should be pretty interesting. Beer Money are doing well and of Team 3D are finally being used well.

Because I don't watch a lot of TNA I can't really comment on the midcard except to say that focusing it around Suicide is a great idea. Overall I'd say the immediate to medium term future for TNA looks fairly good, it all depends on what they do with the Samoa Joe heel turn. They are definitely in a stronger possition than they were the last time I wrote a column about them
Kano, your thoughts? Try to keep it civil mate...

The way I see TNA is the WWE graveyard, or a place for people who couldn't make it in the WWE. There are a lot of flaws I find with TNA, including over kill of gimmick matches. I remember reading in an interview that Kurt wanted it more based on wrestling then gimmicks. I also believe TNA relies to much on promos and segments as of late with only 23 minutes of wrestling in a 2 hour show while ECW a 1 hour show has just under 30 minutes of wrestling. My final thought is TNA could be something, they have the talent, they just need to use it.
Well Kafu, you are right about the Joe storyline being interesting. I disagree with you saying that it doesn't make any sence because it makes all the sence in the world to me. The M.E.M are extremely well known for using politics and underhanded tricks to keep their spot while Kurt made it clear that they were a family. Families take one for the team and this is what Steiner, Nash and Booker did when Joe demolished them. Tag team wrestling is definitely great in TNA right now as you said, it always has been and always will be. There's a solid mix of midcarders, X-Division wrestlers and main eventers in their right now to keep it fresh enough to stay strong.

Kano, fans of TNA know exactly what they are going to get and that's segments and promo's. I can understand why people don't like this but it really does help hype up the feuds, it also saves TNA from giving away PPV quality main events like Smackdown has been doing lately. I'll wait until you watch TNA to get your full thoughts on it, should be interesting to hear. I know that you're watching mainly because of Kurt Angle and now that he's champion again, that may keep your focus.

That's almost all we have time for today. I hope you've enjoyed Kano's, Vitamin K’s and my perspective on a few current issues in wrestling. If there's anything you want us to discuss next time then tell us and we'll gladly discuss it. I'm also certain that it was the first collab that all three of us have done so if you have any advice there we'd gladly take it. Before we leave Kafu has 10 reasons why it's great to be Australian.

That’s right sports fans it’s top 10 time and this time it’s the top 10 reasons why it’s great to be an Australian.

10 – Australia is better than Canada

9 – Australia has four, count them, four different codes of football – AFL, NRL, Rugby Union and Football (soccer). There’s a little something for everyone.

8 – We know how to spell colour correctly

7 – We don’t put the date down backwards like the Americans.

6 – We have The Chaser’s War On Everything.

5 - We know how to play cricket

4 - Nathan Jones

3 - We have the number 3 in Australia

2 – Rove

1 - We have the superhero Kevin Rudd PM who with sidekicks Swanny, Admiral Oink and ninja master Dereck Obama fights Doctor Unpopular, the global economic crisis and the Bull.

I’m Vitamin K, they were Kano and Box Car Rocco, and we’re out of here. Go Team Australia.

[The Age of Orton]

10 – Australia is better than Canada

9 – Australia has four, count them, four different codes of football – AFL, NRL, Rugby Union and Football (soccer). There’s a little something for everyone.

8 – We know how to spell colour correctly

7 – We don’t put the date down backwards like the Americans.

6 – We have The Chaser’s War On Everything.

5 - We know how to play cricket

4 - Nathan Jones

3 - We have the number 3 in Australia

2 – Rove

1 - We have the superhero Kevin Rudd PM who with sidekicks Swanny, Admiral Oink and ninja master Dereck Obama fights Doctor Unpopular, the global economic crisis and the Bull.

____________________________________

10. That's nothing to be proud of.

9. AFL & Soccer are joke sports.

8. Lawl.

7. Well spotted.

6. ...and jokes about kids on their death beds.

5. Most of us do anyway. Unfortunately our National team forgot how.

4. See no.10

3. Wut?

2. Funny sometimes, pretty hit or miss.

1. Lol.

[Vikodin]

That's it, Age of Orton, for calling AFL a joke sport the Boys from Aus are officially revoking your Australian status.

[Swanton Bomb]

Hey guys, I think it's great seeing you write a collab after being barred from US vs UK (although in the end it was best for the competition - I kid, I kid).

I don't think you expanded on enough points here. I thought that if you had allowed Kano and Kafu to argue about their opinions and BCR be the 'peace maker' of sorts, this would have been better i.e. with the Orton future HOF status, that could of gone on for at least half of what your entire column ended up being.

I hope you do another one, except this time I'd like to see more conlict, and also your spelling and grammar needs improvement. Seriously, with three of you there should have been no problems!

I kid.

Read you next time!

[Vikodin]

I'm fairly certain that we are going to do another one, so yeah some stuff to work on I guess. Hopefully in the next one me and Kano can get a bit of an arguement going on

Thanks for the feedback Swanton Bomb, and it's nice to see you've changed the name.

[Freeman]

Well its about time, haven't you boys been cooking this one up since 1993 or something?

Sorry guys, but it was a little meh for me. You didn't seem to have a proper topic throughout, and there were too many smaller topics that didn't really get discussed in greater detail.

However, I would like to see you lot do this again. The banter between all of you was pretty entertaining and the list at the end was pretty funny, if only because it's total bollocks (I kid, I kid.)

Overall, not bad and fairly entertaining, just a couple of issues really. Hopefully we'll be seeing The Boys From Aus return fairly soon.

[Martin Riggs]

This was pretty good, as with every column there can be improvements, see above for those really, they've been pointed out.

Conflict would be great as well, espesh in a 3-man column.

Oh, and from an aesthetic point of view, i absolutely loved the colour fonts you guys picked. Seriously, the green and yellow together is awesome, and the white/grey doesn't detract from it at all...

[sir sam]

Represent my Aussie friends.....

Oh and I am all for revoking Age of Orton's citizenship for his comments. He sounds like a Pom to me.

Nice work, most of the points I was thinking of have been mentioned above but otherwise nice work.

P.S. Jealous of anyone who went to see RAW live. I tossed up going and lost out in the end but am now wishing I had been there. Oh well the money I saved can go towards funding Big Day Out tickets or something.

[Super Chrisss]

I love collab columns, and this one was pretty darn good as well. I agree with most of you Aussie's opinions except for Australia being better than Canada. That is a joke since Canada is better than America and America is better than Australia. So HA

[Kano]

Sorry Chris wrong answer. We have some of the hottest chicks around, the best beaches, the best people, the best sports, the best of everything. At least our 13 year olds can spell and write something most people can understand and the thing we have over americans is well. America is dirty, while Australia is clean.

But thankyou for reading, over time you will learn the awesomeness of Australia. Hope you tune into for the next one

[ca$hmoney]

Aussies,

This was alright, but it seemed a little disconnected at times. I'm sure that'll improve as you write more together. I agree with BCR, the Joe thing totally makes sense.

[Uncle Joe]

This was ok, nothing spectacular, but I suggest you guys keep doing it anyway; you have obvious chemistry, you just need need to develop a better flow which will come with time and practice. Also, the only good reason to be Australian was Isla Fisher, but she went and married that homo from Borat.

[The Maz]

Aussie Aussie Aussie...

Pretty much what has already been said. Keep at it but expand a bit more and utilise the controversial voices that Kafu and Kano have. I look forward to seeing this develop.