The Colour Of Wrestling One: Black

[Swanton Bomb]

Hi, I’m The Enigma Of Charisma, and you may remember me from the classic column known as ‘Droppin’ The Bomb’. Well, I say ‘classic’ – it’s only seen a grand total of seven editions. But not to worry, the writer formerly known as Swanton Bomb has come back to produce a totally new eight-part series entitled ‘The Colour Of Wrestling’. Throughout the series, I will show you what each of the eight colours I have chosen has to do with wrestling, and you will tell me how wonderful each column is by giving me some great feedback. Understand? Great! Let’s get this show on the metaphorical road!

Black is for… Heels

It was the obvious choice, wasn’t it? In ye merry olde lande of WWE, heels represent the black as night villains who constantly wage war against the do-gooder nation of pure, bright as day faces. And who doesn’t love a good battle of pure versus evil? I know I do. But what is a heel? What makes a heel great? Well, that’s what you’re just about to find out… so hold on tight.

An Array of Heel Characters

The Badass Heel – Perhaps one of the rarest types of heel in the business, the badass will not only hold no regard for the rules, but he will purposefully go out to try and insult and injure the top superstars and everyone around them, face or heel. The badass heel, due to his actions, either finds himself absolutely despised or extremely idolised. Take for instance Randy Orton – Orton is the badass who will take out anyone to get to the top, including his boss, and won’t be afraid to completely throw the rulebook out of the window. The majority of fans hate his guts, and the majority of these are ordinary marks. The minority of fans worship him and, as you guessed, usually these are the smart fans. However, sometimes certain badass heels find themselves on the opposite side of the fence, which is mainly to do with who they represent. You could compare Randy Orton to Stone Cold Steve Austin but because one represents the ungrateful self-righteous type and the other represents the working class who are fed up with the boss, Orton will be forever a heel and Austin will forever be a face.

The Cowardly Heel – One of the more common heels, the coward will try his best to step out of one on one confrontations and instead rely on a large advantage when feuding with a face foe. Cowards will sometimes intentionally get themselves disqualified or counted out, fearing more for their safety (or championship) than their pride. A good example of this is Randy Orton in his second World Title reign, in which he was disqualified four times – against Shawn Michaels at Cyber Sunday, Chris Jericho at Armageddon, Jeff Hardy on Raw (albeit for Jeff’s Intercontinental Championship, not Orton’s WWE Championship) and John Cena at No Way Out.

The Home Town Bashing Heel – Although strictly this is more of a tactic than a type of heel, I thought this should be covered. The home town basher will consistently make fun of the town or city that they happen to be in that night, often insulting their favourite sports team. This sort of heel is often looking for a cheap way to garner heat, and none is more effective than this. Many heels used this in the early 2000’s, for example Edge and Christian – usually, before they performed the five second pose for the benefit of those with flash photography, they would bash the town’s American football team, usually taunting them about their latest defeat.

The Dark Heel – The dark heel is the heel who seems to have supernatural abilities, and is a very sadistic human being (although, they can’t be a human being if they’re supernatural. Oh well). The dark heel will use his powers to intimidate and dominate everyone, and bares no thought for their opponent’s wellbeing. The supernatural abilities one can have are usually the abilities to control fire and lightning, or even light as a whole. Dark heels can also possess people to create their own faction, notably The Undertaker’s Ministry of Darkness. There is only one dark heel on the entire WWE roster at the moment, with said dark heel being Kane, although at the moment he only seems to use the ability to manipulate fire when entering or exiting the ring.

The Monster Heel – The monster heel, who uses his size advantage and intimidation to win matches, is one of the most poorly used heels in this business because of the tendency to build up the heel and then job him out to whoever they decide to push at the time. In a shoot fight, monster heels would usually come out on top, but in the land of pro-wrestling they never seem to be able to make it past jobber-to-the-stars status. Good examples of monster heels are The Big Show, Kane, Mark Henry, The Great Khali, Umaga and Mike Knox. But the first four have had World Championships reigns, I hear you say! Well, the last world championship The Big Show had was the ECW Championship, and that’s not high on anyone’s list of prestigious Championships anymore. Kane’s only WWE Championship reign lasted a day, The Great Khali was food for Batista, and Mark Henry… well, he’s Mark Henry. Do I even need to say anything else on the matter? However, no one can argue that they are one of the best ways to put over a main eventer.

The Foreign Heel – As you can tell, the foreign heel is, well, foreign. The foreign heel usually talks in their native language, making audiences hate them for simply not being bothered to try and learn English. Well… who cares? Seriously, the fact that someone is foreign should not mean that you hate them. Racists, the lot of you! I joke, of course - A foreign heel is usually only hated when they hate on your country. Good examples are La Resistance, Nikolai Volkoff, and The Iron Sheik, although Umaga, Vladimir Koslov and The Great Khali could also come into this category.

The Self Righteous Heel – I know. Pretty much every wrestler, face or heel, is self-righteous in some quantity. But let me ask you – do (successful) face wrestlers ever call the crowd hypocrites; announce their own name, sometimes twice in the same sentence; or consistently talk about their family lineage? No. Trust me; these guys deserve their own heel category, especially when we consider the variety of different types of self-righteousness. We have the ‘I’m better than you because my Daddy trained me up’ heels (yeah, I’m looking at you, Legacy), the ‘You’re all hypocrites, you’re disgusting parasites who thrive on watching grown men beat each other up, and I want some respect because I’m the Superstar Of The Year 2008’ type of heels, and then the ‘I’m so good that I can repeat my name at varying volumes and talk about myself in the third person’ heels. Seriously, the WWE can’t seem to get enough of arrogance these days.

To be honest, I hate the new Chris Jericho at the moment. A lot of you are heaping criticism on the Matt Hardy heel turn because ‘he’s a whiney bitch’, but isn’t Jericho just a more vocal version than that? At least Matt fights on through his ‘injury’, even if he does complain about it. At the moment, all that the former Y2J seems to be doing is calling the crowds hypocrites (with various other insults), demanding respect and throwing tirades at General Managers and Divas alike. Is that not a bit whiney in the slightest? I’ve not seen Jericho do anything more intimidating than slapping John Morrison. Sure, it was all good when it was part of the feud of the year with Shawn Michaels, but the ‘hypocrite’ thing was aimed at Michaels, but now it’s just a general insult, and doesn’t mean anything at all if he doesn’t explain why that particular crowd deserve to be called so. Come on Chris – man up, and gain some hard-earned real heel heat.

Heels – How Do They Manage?

You have no microphone skills whatsoever, a boring personality, and seem to be floundering around, trying to find your heel status. What do you do? That’s right - you get a manager. From Yokozuna to Umaga, from The Undertaker to Kane, many successful heels have used the limitless skills of some of the greatest managers in the world. Managers are basically there to help a heel get some heat, and generally make them seem more interesting. Some of the greatest of all time used their manager’s services, but it must be noted that the most successful wrestler/manager teams have been heels. Let’s face it, does a good guy really need a manager if he can let the fists do the talking? Heels are meant to be ‘weaker’ than their counterparts, so they even the odds. Would Jimmy Hart have been utilised properly if paired with Hulk Hogan? No, because managers bring that uncertainty and ruthlessness to raise the quality of a match, a Hulk Hogan never needs help from anybody. Well, aside from lawyers. Another plus about managers is that they have so many different and remarkable tactics. Jimmy Hart had the megaphone, Paul Bearer had the Urn and Stephanie McMahon had her… well, you get the idea. The fact is, that managers are fun!

So why do we see guys like Shelton Benjamin, Vladimir Koslov and Umaga without managers at the moment? Umaga had one of the best managers in recent times in Armando Estrada but, because Estrada was too good and nearly caused Umaga to turn, they were split up. Vladimir Koslov would do a lot better with a Russian manager, and Shelton Benjamin… well, his athletic abilities are quite something, and with a manager he would surely rise to the top. I really don’t understand why WWE have a sudden absence of managers. Who was the last great manager we saw? I mean, The Great Khail has Ranjin Singh, but who else is there? No, Hornswoggle doesn’t count, because he’s not a heel and is just entertainment for the kiddies. Why don’t we have Santino Marella manage Koslov for a while? Just manage the comedic moments we would have with those two! Back in the glory days, managers helped their wrestlers a lot, and surely it would be a wise decision to stop the boycott.

Painting By Numbers – The Top 5 Heel Tactics

It’s a common fact – heels love to cheat. I don’t know why, because there’s got to be a heel somewhere that can fight without using underhand tactics. No? Oh. Never mind. Anyway, I just wanted to see how effective some of these tactics are. Chairshot, anyone?

5. Turnbuckle Removal - Currently Jack Swagger's favourite offence, turnbuckle removal is a simple manouver that can sometimes knockout an opponent. Wrestlers simply have to make sure that the referee is distracted, and then go over to the desired corner and either untie or bite off the turnbuckle pad. Then the fun is yours! However, there have been many a time when this plot has backfired, notably Christian vs Jack Swagger at Backlash 2009 and The Great Khali vs Kane at Wrestlemania 23.

4. Countout/Disqualification - Mainly used by the cowardly heel, the sole intention here is to stop the match as soon as possible. When a heel is faced with a tough opponent (either a champion in a non-title match, anyone in a title match or a big-man wrestler), they want to get out of the contest as soon as possible, thus reserving their energy, and further tormenting their opponent. Notable usage includes Randy Orton vs John Cena at No Way Out 2008, and Chris Jericho vs The Big Show on Smackdown in early 2008. However, sometimes this can go against them, like when a General Manager reverses a decision, or makes the said wrestler forfeit their title.

3. Outside Interference - Mainly used by heels who have a manager or are part of a stable, sometimes this can be used for the same purposes as the above tactic - to get out of the match as quickly as possible by causing a disqualification. But sometimes, it goes further than that. Sometimes, the heel gets their backup plan to attack their opponent whilst the referee's back is turned. This is a good tactic when properly executed, with some one of the best uses of this coming from Survivor Series 2003, in which Randy Orton last eliminated Shawn Michaels due to a Batista Bomb, thus forcing Stone Cold Steve Austin to relinquish his role as Co-General Manager of Raw.

2. The Low Blow – Probably one of the most effective tactics, this one’s been around for a long time. Some of the greats like Ric Flair have used this well, although mostly this is used as a way of escaping your opponent’s finishing move. This tactic not only allows you to regain some ground, it also opens up a doorway to hit your own finisher, or to get you intentionally disqualified. Take Shawn Michaels vs Randy Orton at Cyber Sunday – had Orton not hit a low blow in front of the referee, Michaels would have successfully connected with Sweet Chin Music and walked out of Washington D.C. as the Champion.

1. Weapon Usage – The Megaphone. The Sledgehammer. The Steel Chair. All of these weapons have been used by great heels to win their matches, and it is by far the most efficient way to garner heel heat. However, it is also the most efficient way to lose a match by accident, too. Yes, the steel chair may have helped Stone Cold Steve Austin win the Royal Rumble, and helped The Rock defeat Mankind, but how about the other way around? How about The Undertaker defeating Triple H at Wrestlemania 18? Or The Undertaker chokeslamming Mankind onto thumbtacks? Yes, weapon usage is the one thing that gets you the most heel heat during matches, but it’s also the one that’s the least predictable.



That’s it for this weeks ‘The Colour Of Wrestling’. I hope you all enjoyed the show, and want to come back next week fro some more. If you have any advice for me, or want to disagree with me on some of the points I made, then go ahead. That’s what the columns forum is all about – causing debate and proving our points. See you round!

[Box Car Rocco]

1. Good to see you back

2. Don't you dare make me bust out my Mark Henry Gif!!

You pretty much covered all the tactics a heel uses and the types of heels there are while providing examples which was a good job.

How can you not like the new Jericho though, I was laughing with joy when he made his last promo on Raw because I knew everything he said was true and deep down so does everyone else. People just hate that they didn't point it out earlier and they hate him for it.

I'm intrigued in the rest of the series, read ya next time.

[Kano]

Very Impressive

Please write more often, this was great. I don't have anything else I can say but well done and very nice.

Good to have you back.

[the ticking clock]

First off, welcome back!

Secondly, this was a fun little read. You covered a lot of ground in the world of heels and provided some good examples. I do think you sold Jericho a little short here. Do you like him when he's complaining and calling himself superior? Of course you don't - that's why he's a succesful heel. You aren't meant to like heels.

Also, digging the new look, and the lack of bright coloured text actually helped the column in my opinion. Looking forward to no 2!

[TheLipBomb]

First off, I hate you're new name. Swanton Bomb was fine. Just my opinion.


The column was awesome. I recall writing on this topic back in the early CSI. I think you did a good job in covering all the bases. And I agree that the plain text works better in your columns.


I see you're point with Jericho but, it's not like he's all bark and no bite. Jericho can go in the ring he is just spending more time on the mic for legitamate heel heat.

Well done.

[Hustle]

What makes Jericho's heel work so amazing is the fact that he has so much conviction in everything he says and does. What also helps is that he's really not saying much that isn't true. He takes our faults and throws them in our faces, but we're too proud to admit defeat. We don't want to have our faults thrown at us like that. We want to feel perfect.

Matt, on the other hand, still only needs to wear one goggle when he goes swimming, but he's limited to only having his heel act work with Jeff. Pudgee is fucked now.

That said, I enjoyed this column, and I anticipate the remainder of the series. Good job.

[NightofDay]

This was an entertaining read Enigma. You made a little error by saying that Undertaker defeated Triple H at WrestleMania X-8, when in actuality you meant Undertaker defeated Triple H at WrestleMania X-Seven or Undertaker defeated Ric Flair at WrestleMania X-8.

Apart from that, this was good. You displayed some of the heel tactics that have been most famous and you did it in a convincing way. I'm looking forward to next time.

[The Maz]

Swanny, you are certainly one of the more creative writers around here. This is a very interesting idea which was very well done. I really hope that taking on an 8-part series is not too much for you as you do tend to disappear on us. I particularly liked the part on managers and was a little disapointed it was not a bit longer.

Good stuff and I hope part 2 will not be too far away.

[manuellh]

hey man i just think that the heels makes the wrestling a lot more interesting, sometimes you will be laughing them for his tactics or when you really cannot stand what they do. and most important when the face finally makes the big win at the end its when you see by the reaction of the crowd when the wrestler can figure out if he is a good or a great heel.

i do think that jericho work with the mic is outstanding and when you compare his promos with the promos of others heels its like you could think that he is giving a free ticket to say whatever he wants to just to draw heat he seems so natural.

anyway great read

[L-Man]

Dude this is great I am looking forward to this series

[Mike]

Very enjoyable read! You did a great job of highlighting the different aspects of the different heel archetypes. I didn't really realize but your right about the misuse. I don't agree with stuff about Jericho, I think he's doing great at the moment.

On a side note that picture of Taker is totally badass.

Great work, keep it up!

[Evelyn]

I enjoyed this, it was really well written and informative. I'm looking forward to reading the rest of the series; I'm sure it'll prove a great way of explaining different aspects of wrestling

[JoeyShinobi]

This was pretty comprehensive, Swanny, and showed a much more mature side to your writing after your cartoon fantasy booking exploits. I'd really like to see some more opinion in here, because most of this was descriptive. Why are heels so important? Who's the best, and why? I'd have loved to have seen something about pyschology here as well - Triple H was always one of the best for that.

I can't wait to see what you've got planned for the other 7 colours. This is a big opportunity to build some momentum and develop - you've picked an excellent way of hooking in readers. Keep 'em coming.

[Lucas_Nova]

Until i'd read the feedbck, I thought this was the best debut I'd seen, however it appears your name round these parts, so, even if I wasn't around to catch you before, welcome back!

I'm a big fan of columns that take an analytical approach, and I'll be honest, personally, I loved this. It was an in-depth study into the world of heels, and a great way to show the variations of a heel and the way the heel as evolved with many branches.

Great stuff man, and I'll definately catch next time round!

Nova.

[Swanton Bomb]

Box Car Rocco – 1) Thanks! 2) Bring it on! 3) I’ll come back to anything Jericho related later

Kano – Thank you very much!

the ticking clock – Welcome back yourself! I got rid of the blue for now, because I really didn’t know how to put black text onto a black background… but don’t worry, It’s not what you think! As I said before, more Jericho later

TheLipBomb – What?!?! You don’t like my new name! Well tough, it’s sticking with me for the rest of the column… more Jericho later…

Hustle – Thanks, but you deeply offend me every time you call Matt Pudgee… What about Kane? Trevor Murdoch? The Big Show? Mark Henry? Umaga?

NightofDay – I know, I had to look up which Mania it was, took ages because the internet kept stopping and starting… and when I found out, I forgot to change it on the column!

Mazza – Well, I’m definitely here to stay, and I’ll tell you why in my next column… and who knows, I might do a whole column about managers someday…

Manuellh – Thanks very much, and more later…

L-MAN – Thanks!

Mike – Thank you and I agree, that picture is badass

Evelyn – Thank you, and you’re not biased at all… but I’m sure you didn’t need to be biased, I agree that my column is awesome!

JoeyShinobi – Thanks Joey, I always like your feedback because you never fail to offer ways to improve. I’ll definitely take your advice!

Lucas_Nova – Thanks very much, and I suppose it is a debut of sorts, a debut of a different name and no colour!

Everyone who had anything to say about Jericho – I am definitely not doubting his mic skills, because quite frankly he is the best that WWE has at the moment. However, I think that he sounds a little bit forced sometimes, mainly because he’s going lower than he usually does, but not just for the most important bits – all of it. Maybe it was just because when I watched the first Smackdown! After Backlash, he was in nearly every backstage segment complaining to someone. However, I did enjoy his opening confrontation with Edge and CM Punk, and I know that he can damn sure take care of anyone who tries to mess with him. All I’m saying is, it’s getting a little repetitive, and maybe he can finally change a little bit with his feud with Mysterio.

Thanks a lot to everyone who fed back!

[Stinger]

I'm not familiar with your previous work Enigma, but I definitely liked this. There were a few things that could have made it better, specifically those that Joey made mention of, but as is, it's still a good read.

An eight part series is a huge undertaking, I've seen people attempting to do trilogies fold having never completed it. So I definitely hope to see you follow this all the way through. Right now, you have me locked in and I'm looking forward to see the second colour.

[Martin Riggs]

This was awesome, really it was. It was just wonderfully thought up and really nicely put together. I'm anxiously waiting for the second part now, so get it out quickly!

[Vikodin]

Loved it mister poster-formerly-known-as-Swanton-Bomb.

Great piece, really interesting read, and I'm looking forward to the next one

[Stryder]

Interesting read, I like the way you laid out your points clearly and concisely and also your way of categorising heels. Jericho has become a whiney bitch hasn’t he? I prefer him as a heel to a face but he needs to tone it down a bit, its fine when he’s out there insulting the fans but I just don’t think he should take the “ look how hard I have it / I got screwed give me a title shot” line and running to authority figures it just makes him look weak in my opinion.

I whole heartedly agree on your section about managers and more importantly that they should be used with heels as opposed to faces. Bobby Heenan, Mr Fuji, Jimmy Hart and even to some degree Paul Heyman all managed hugely successful heel wrestlers. Now I’m not saying they were successful due to their managers but it surely helped for the reasons u stated ( extra heat, interference etc). Guy like Shelton Benjamin, Big Show, Umaga and maybe even Jack Swagger would benefit from a mouth piece and it could be just what they need to propel them into the main event scene ( I still don’t feel like Show is in the main event scene even after his Mania performance and now feud with Cena).

Look forward the next 7 parts.